Warning: When you live in the country never step foot off your screened porch with toddler in hand while talking to you prayer partner on the phone… screaming, shrill, musical notes in the sound of OHHH..SSSSSNake…sixfoot. five. four. big. bye. gotta. go. SNAKE!…may leave your prayer partner in a fit of hysterical laughs.
I proceeded into the house with strict orders for the girls to stay inside, while I put on my tallest boot..lime green hunter water boots…ran out the back door to the shed..grabbed a shovel..decided against also carrying the axe..returned to the scene of the snake spotting only for anger to rise with-in me that the HUGE snake was now hiding in the vicinity…I looked under the porch but could not see anything..(and remembered my last snake encounter near the porch) .then thought like a snake and lifted my over grown purple-headed chives…AHHHH! I quickly shoved the shovel on the snake and attempted decapitation….the wood chips prevented my thrusts from penetrating….so I stood on the snake and asked Pippi (who had cracked the front door to make sure I was safe) to get my camera and take a picture of me…the batteries were dead…
Next, I coaxed her to get me the phone..I called boss man and he was one hour away planting a field of corn…he suggested sending Pippi out to the shed to grab the axe..
WHAT? She is four..I do not let her hold sharp knives…she doesn’t know what an axe is…I had no choice…well I could have let the snake go..like I said NO CHOICE!
The sweet girl had brought our sun screen to kill the snake..after I convinced her sun screen would not protect us from the snake she decided if she was going to walk across the yard to the shed she should put sunscreen on…The snake was wrapping it’s tail around my boot so I repositioned….
Pippi then decided she needed to wear socks to protect her toes…Mister snake was attempting to slither out of my shovel pin….she went inside…upstairs…back down stairs…onto the porch and deliberated which shoes were snake safe…and I deliberated if I could just grab the snake by the head..shivered at the thought and encouraged Pippi towards her task. She sauntered to the shed…turned upon arrival and yelled, “What is an AXE?”
“Something to cut down trees.” She disappeared into the shed, walked around the outside of the shed.I reminded her the axe was INSIDE..she shrugged her shoulders and returned to the dark abyss..a few minutes later she peeked out of the shed dragging our yellow handled axe, “Is this it?”
“YES” I exhaled.
Pippi, picked it up triumphantly as I praised her searching skills…like Paul Bunyan….and began to walk towards the house…
Please drag the axe behind you!”
she arrived at my side and watched as I then chopped the head off the massive beast.
I changed batteries in the camera and returned to find Pippi holding the dead snake…
I shrieked and she dropped in on the porch…then I thought, “Why not” so she picked it up
and played with it dancing and singing about how she helped Mommy kill the big snake…. until she noticed blood dripping from it then the fun was over.
For a few days…
I found this guy two inches from my foot while staining the playset…I sat a log on him while I finished my section…I was MAD…and kept thinking the silly thing would slither out from underneath me..but I was determined to not change my plans for a snake…Pippi came outside to watch me…I even let her find the axe for me…my little pioneer girl!