Breast Parts Man

I do not know how to say this…I ..uhh….. Well…..So ….he……bra….my….pink….

I flashed a sales man.

Yes, I, a thirty year old wife and mother of two managed to bare my bra to a stranger on my property.  Not any random stranger selling vaccums….no, I could not be that blessed…it was Eldon, the local tractor dealership parts salesman delivering rain gauges to his customers…..who include Boss Man and his parents and uncles and cousins, and our friends and our neighbors and our fellow church members and well almost everyone I know….

Eldon is a gentleman and acted as though he did not notice…well, maybe he did not notice..I am sure he did not notice other wise he would have been scared off and I would not have my new rain gauge sitting in my petunias….

I am certain the blessed man was spared viewing my breast polka dots.

Whew!

How did my bra, strapped on my body, end up in the front window?

I blame the polka dots….

I needed a photo of polka dots to grace the cute post about my daughter’s use of the phrase ‘breast polka dots.’

To take a decent photo one needs good light….In my house that means the front porch–remember the farm is ‘in the middle of somewhere’  and our home is surrounded by trees,  even Fed Ex has difficulty delivering packages to me–as you can imagine I am use to complete privacy.

(What was I thinking!)

Today,  the porch was too windy so I opted for the large front window……

I pulled up my shirt…….

positioned my breast to get the best light on my bra

and began shooting.

Did I mention it is windy–that means my alarm system dogs can’t hear trucks pull up on these windy days…I can’t hear trucks pull up on these windy days…but I can see a man circling our drive…WHAT? A MAN!

I hit the floor,

flung the camera…

pulled down my shirt and peaked out the window–

Yes, he was walking to the door…now I moved even quicker–diving for all the toys on the ground–why I felt it necessary to clean up when it is obvious from my messy pony tail, my eight year old VBS t-shirt and crying baby that I do not have it all together is a beside the point.  I think I wanted to attempt a good first impression in case he had seen my polka dots.

I shoved the basket of toys out of sight, scooped up my distraught baby and greeted Eldon with a smile, cheerful, “Hello. Yes, I am Boss Man’s wife. Nice to finally meet you,” and accepted the rain gauge on behalf of our Farm.

As Eldon turned to leave the electrician’s truck pulled into the yard to fix the irrigation system.

I choose a sub par image for my post–I had flashed my polks dots enough for one day.

Speak Your Mind

*